I see all of these gardening thingies (I call them thingies because I have no idea what they actually ARE) and I want them. Sometimes I think if I had these nifty little gadgets, I could grow stuff. If you have known me for more than five minutes, you know that I am not an outdoor person. Although the idea of gardening sounds fun, I am way too lazy for it. Also now that I have an awful back, I'd never be able to bend over and do all of that work on the ground. What a...bummer? I hate hot weather, too. I don't like to sweat. People that have to be close enough to smell me don't like it when I sweat, either.
So instead of giving gardening tips like I am some sort of expert, I decided to show you all of the thingies that seem like they could turn me into a quasi-gardener.
This, my friends, is how I prepare to garden.
First, I would buy an AeroGarden. This thing looks FUN. Like all I would have to do it open up the box and pour some water on it and voila! I'M A GARDENER.
I also like the fact that it looks kinda like a UFO, and the top part appears to be hovering. I think maybe I just want this to be in my house because it's neat looking. They have them in different colors. Some of them grow tomatoes!
Topsy Turvy tomato thing on tv and I wondered if it would really work. I tried to grow tomatoes once, and I ended up with a pile of tangled weeds. My grandfather had a tomato garden when I was a kid and those fresh tomatoes were so yummy. I wanted to have fresh tomatoes all the time! Now, with this jacked up windsock, it might be possible!
Then I found out about these things. They look like alien pods. I am fascinated. I think they are sort of like automatic plant growers. Could I screw this up? Possibly. Will they look cute on my countertop? Absolutely!
They make this thing, too! It's professional.
These things seem like they could really help me become a real gardener. Like stuff someone who knows what they're doing would buy. It's almost like buying them would make me credible as a botanist!
And that's how I prepare for gardening in the spring. I'll buy stuff like this that'll make it easy! Or maybe I'll just buy a bunch of seeds and throw them in the yard. Sort of like grab bag gardening. We'll just wait and see what pops up. I left our jack-o-lantern from Halloween 2008 by the mailbox so long, it sprouted and now we have a lovely vine on the mailbox. Turns out my laziness is good for something, sometimes!
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